What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Randomize
