dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
