the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
So squirting runs in the family.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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