I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
More tranny stories later!
we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
