At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
I am full of burrito and curiosity
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
