i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
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