Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Randomize
