Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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