I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
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