Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
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