i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Randomize
