Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Randomize
