I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
I'm just crazy horny about you
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Randomize
