Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
Randomize
