Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Randomize
