Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
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