We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
