i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
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