Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
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