He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
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