and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
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