i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
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