We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
