Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
Randomize
