Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Randomize
