I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
Randomize
