New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
I think your dad took our porno
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
Randomize
