Jon just got arrested by the quesadilla police
What?!?
What I actually meant, is I had a quesadilla, and Jon got arrested by the real police
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
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