Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Randomize
