Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
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