so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Randomize
