no, he came in my armpit
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Randomize
