Someone shit on the floor
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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