Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
