you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
