I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Randomize
