me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
Randomize
