I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
you inspire me to be a worse person
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
