True but thats because hes a fetus.
she looked like the before picture.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
