Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
