she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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