my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize
