Whoa Z and x make the same sound
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
