at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
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