I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
Randomize
