i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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