i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize
