Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
Randomize
