weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
