he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Randomize
